make it memorable

WEDDING TOASTER GUIDE

DON’T GOOGLE, JUST USE THIS GUIDE ON HOW TO GIVE A GREAT

Wedding Toast.

Congratulations on being asked to speak at a wedding reception – please consider it a true honor and privilege!

I understand how nerve-racking it can be to stand up in front of a group of individuals and speak. I can vividly recall the first wedding I ever did and just how utterly terrified I was to announce the Grand Entrance. So, I get it – public speaking is not easy nor does it come naturally for most!

Thus, I have designed this guide to help you create a memorable toast and ease what nerves you may have. Use as much or as little of the information below as you would like. If you prefer a physical medium, each section has a link to a downloadable PDF file that you can print out and use.

And yes, I do practice what I preach. In 2017, I followed the very same advice and tips offered below for my toast at my brother’s wedding reception – and CRUSHED IT. So, please, consider your toast as your time to shine; you have been selected as a spokesperson for the guests of honor on the greatest day of their life! Be sentimental, be funny, be personal – just make it memorable!

If at any time you need additional assistance, need help in incorporating a creative idea or unique presentation, or just have a few questions to ask, my phone and email are always available to you!

Once again, congratulations, and best of luck!

Toasting Tips

Toasting Tips

Now that you’ve been asked to give a toast, and accepted such an honor, I’d like to offer you a few tips and points of emphasis to consider before you begin to write your toast. Below are my top tips, based on attending hundreds of wedding receptions and witnessing thousands of toasts.

 

Don’t Procrastinate, Do Your Homework Early
If you wait until the week of the wedding to start working on your toast, it is far too late. Start well in advance and allow yourself time to develop what you want to say and how you want to say it. Standup comedians work on their material for months before they perform their special, as they are constantly revising until it is “just right”. Remember: proper preparation builds confident speakers, and confident speakers always resonate better with audiences.

 

Pick A Theme For Your Toast
It is always a good idea to organize your thoughts around a key subject, as you will quickly draw your audience into your speech and make it easy for them to follow along. You’ll come across as extremely clever as you tie the beginning, middle, and end of your speech together. In the “Theme Ideas” section, I’ll provide you with some examples to help inspire you.

 

Remember to K.I.S.S. (Keep It Short & Simple)
As a rule of thumb, and to avoid straining the audience’s attention, I recommend toasts to be honed down to three to five minutes (unless you are a particularly captivating speaker who is amazingly eloquent, hilariously funny, or insanely charismatic). If you are really feeling nervous about making a toast, it is perfectly acceptable to keep it short and simple and say a few words and raise your glass in honor of the couple.

 

Make It Personal
All wedding guests love to hear anecdotal stories about you and the newlyweds. Use famous quotes if they tie into a story, or maybe offer a tip or two of marital advice, but don’t turn your toast into a lecture. Since this is a joyous occasion, do feel free to embellish your stories or poke a bit of fun at someone along the way. Remember, EVERYONE should be laughing together and enjoying your toast.

 

Know Your Audience
Weddings typically draw a diverse group of people of all different ages and backgrounds. While it is impossible to please everyone, do avoid politics, and do try to avoid any potential off-color material or humor. My rule of thumb: if the grandparents would find your joke funny, then it is acceptable for the rest of the wedding guests, too.

 

Use Point Form Notes
Never write out your speech or toast and then try to deliver it word for word at the reception. It usually always comes across as unnatural and quite frankly, boring. Also, the optics look even worse when you read your speech right off your cell phone. Prior to the big day, make point form notes and “talk to” each point as you deliver your speech. I’ll expand on this in the Sample Toast Template section.

 

Limit Your Alcohol Intake
Notice I didn’t say “Don’t drink until after your toast.” What I am saying is to be mindful of your alcoholic beverage consumption prior to delivering your toast. Giving a toast is a big deal; don’t slur, don’t ramble, don’t improv material on the spot, and don’t embarrass yourself or the couple. Believe me, there is PLENTY of time to catch up after the toasts have concluded.

If you need a drink to calm your nerves – fair enough. For other methods of de-stressing before speaking at a wedding, please be sure to review the Dealing With Nerves section.

 

Rehearse Your Toast To At Least Two People
Standup comedians will practice their jokes in front of various audiences to make sure that their material is funny to everyone and not just to some. I recommend toasters deliver their toast in front of at least two different people: someone you are close to, such as a significant other, and someone you are not, such as a colleague at work. Solicit and listen to the constructive feedback offered from both individuals and then make your final revisions.

 

Don’t Forget To Toast The Couple!
Every toaster knows at the end of their speech they need to lift their glass and toast the guests of honor. But time and time again, I’ve seen toasters forget to do it! Make sure the last bullet point of your point form notes includes your call to action: LIFT GLASS & TOAST THE NEWLYWEDS

 

And Don’t Forget Your Drink, Too
I will remind you during our pre-toast prep meeting, but I’ll state it now: don’t forget to bring your drink with you! There is nothing more awkward than killing it with a great toast and then realizing you forgot your drink back at your table as you ask everyone to raise their glass. Consider writing this as the precursory bullet point at the top of your toast notes: (BRING NOTES & DRINK)

 

Don’t Be Afraid To Laugh At Yourself
Remember, we are amongst the easiest audience a speaker can talk in front of – family and friends! – so if you blow a line or mess up, just show humility by smiling and laughing at yourself. We’re all human and we all make mistakes. In my career as a professional MC, I’ve definitely made a few along the way – it’s never intentional, but it does happen! – but how I respond to a blunder makes all the difference between losing an audience or gaining more admiration. While you are not planning on messing up, practice a line or two, just in case you accidentally do.

 

Use The Microphone To Your Advantage
THIS IS VERY IMPORTANT: always keep the microphone a couple of inches away from your mouth. Speak normally and allow the microphone to naturally amplify your voice. Try not to move the microphone up, down, left, right, or away from the two to four-inch zone near your mouth – the volume of your voice will fade out if you do!

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Want to print a copy of this guide? Download the PDF version.

The Toaster's Questionnaire
The Toasters Questionnaire

To help get you started, please use the following questionnaire to brainstorm some content to work with. Naturally, these questions start with the Bride and/or Groom. Remember, this is brainstorming – you can always edit your content later – so don’t stop as you write. Also, feel free to omit any questions that are not applicable to you. When you are done, click the button at the bottom of this questionnaire to email a copy of your answers to yourself.

If you would like to print out a paper copy of this questionnaire, please click download the PDF version.

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Theme Ideas
Theme Ideas

In my opinion, a toaster needs to decide on a theme before they write their toast. By choosing a theme, a toaster will immediately hone in on what they want to say, allowing them to organize a clear-cut, well-defined path of thoughts that will be easy for all guests to follow.

When it comes to a wedding, themes are relatively easy to think of, as they usually revolve around the bride, the groom, or both. Here are nine possible themes to consider as you develop your speech.

 

Friendship
With the Friendship theme, consider the experiences you remember most with the bride and/or groom. Consider talking about funny moments, lessons learned, and why the bride and/or groom is such a great friend. Then, translate the history of your friendship into why the newlyweds will have a promising marriage.

 

How They Met
Everyone loves to hear how the couple met, how they fell in love, and how the proposal went down. Consider talking about your perspective of their story – tell us what really happened that night that they met! – and maybe have a little bit of fun embellishing other parts of their love story, as well.

 

Watching Them Grow
This is a great theme for parents and any toaster who has witnessed the growth and development of the bride and/or groom, such as an aunt, uncle, grandparent, teacher, minister, or parole officer (just kidding!). This is one of my favorite toast themes because it always leads to a great toast.

 

The Prescription For A Successful Marriage
This is a great theme for any toaster, as everyone can benefit from words of wisdom (or just a gentle reminder) of what it takes to build and sustain a happy marriage. This theme can be approached from your own experience, by researching the matter through a couple that inspires you, or perhaps by some other creative means. This is the theme that I went with as the basis of my speech at my brother’s wedding.

 

Why They’re Good For Each Other
You’ve heard these three kinds of phenomena before: they complement each other, they complete each other, and opposites do attract. If you believe the newlyweds fall into one of those three, explore that premise in a light, positive, and perhaps humorous way during your speech. What are the quirks, eccentricities, and idiosyncrasies that make them perfect for each other? Tell everyone because as Sean told Will in Good Will Hunting, “People call these things imperfections, but they’re not, aw, that’s the good stuff.”

 

A Toast To Love, Laughter & Happily-Ever-After
If public speaking is not your forte, or you wish to keep your toast short and sweet, use this theme to offer your sincere wishes for the new couple as they embark on a new adventure called marriage. The easiest way to write your speech for this theme is to start at the end and reverse engineer from there. Feel free to look at the section entitled, A Collection of Toasts, for inspiration as you start.

 

Famous Quotations
This is an intermediate theme, as it requires a bit of skill and clever charm to pull off effectively. The best toasts I’ve seen that used this theme involved telling the story of the bride and/or groom through two or three relevant quotes as segues between anecdotal stories. I’ve also seen famous quotations used to segue into “from experience” advice on how to sustain a long-lasting marriage.

Here is an example of a famous quote that I’m sure you’ve heard before in some sort of similar fashion or variation:

“Prescription for a happy marriage: Whenever you’re wrong, admit it, whenever you’re right, shut up.”

– Ogden Nash

 

The Song Parody
As an advanced-level theme, this is perhaps the riskiest theme of all as it will either crush… or bomb (and believe me, I’ve seen both and they are spectacular either way). You will need to dedicate a ton of time to writing and rehearsing your song parody, as well. I would also strongly advise that you record your version and listen back to it during your revisional process.

 

The Slideshow
The Slideshow is also an advanced-level theme, and it is a great idea for those who are better speakers with a visual element. You can go a multitude of ways here – telling the life story of the bride or groom in a concise and funny way is very popular – and using title slides in a humorous way only increases the engagement factor. As mentioned in the Toasting Tips section, do rehearse this in front of at least two different individuals to ensure it is effective.

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Want to print a copy of this guide? Download the PDF version.

Sample Toast Template
Sample Toast Template

The following is an example of a simple and effective wedding toast.  Feel free to modify this template to your style of speaking.

 

GREETING
You do not need to introduce yourself – I, as the Master of Ceremonies, will do such before you speak. A simple greeting and a transitional statement to your opening remarks will suffice.

For example: “Thank you for that introduction. Good evening; I’m honored to stand here before you and say a few words about my best friend, Nick.”

 

OPENING REMARKS
If you would like to address either of the families or the wedding party members, here is where you should do it. Keep it brief, as the bulk of your time should be spent on who you are toasting: the bride and/or groom.

 

BODY OF TOAST
Develop the body of your toast around one of the themes from the Theme Ideas section or implement your own. In a manner that is appropriate to your role, start by speaking to the person you are toasting on behalf of, and then address the couple as a whole.

For example, the Father of the Bride may speak about watching his daughter grow up, and then meeting and welcoming the groom into the family, all while sharing anecdotal stories as appropriate. Or the Maid of Honor may speak about growing up with the bride through the years, how her best friend has always been there for her, and how that translates to the bride always being there for the groom.

 

QUOTES OR ONE-LINER
Completely optional, but here is the place to insert a meaningful quote, poem, or humorous one-liner.

 

THE CLOSE & TOAST
Provide your final thoughts and well wishes, invite guests to raise their glasses, and propose a toast to the newlyweds. Cheers!

 

HOW TO WRITE POINT FORM NOTES

In other sections of my Wedding Toasters Guide, I have alluded to the idea of speaking to point form notes instead of writing your entire speech out. This prevents one from “reading” their toast and losing the attention of the audience.

To give you an example of this method, here are the actual point form notes from my closing toast at my brother’s wedding:

  • Greeting
  • Memories of Us Growing Up
    • GI Joes and Legos, Pro Wrestling Outside (& Inside) The House
    • Movies: we watched a ton, especially baseball movies, also made our own home movies. And re-enact them. George Of The Jungle & The Broken Arm
    • Sports: played them all; our favorites were Football & Baseball
  • How Andy Met Karen
    • Pre-Funking 2014 Seahawks Game at Safeco Field Bar, Andy says Karen was who he going to marry
    • I didn’t believe him, Andy told me to quote him, so later that day I wrote:

“September 4th, 2014: The Seattle Seahawks soundly begin their march toward a second straight Super Bowl and future dynasty, as Marshawn Lynch scores two TDs, Russell Wilson throws for another two, and the Seahawks win 36-16 over Aaron Rodgers and the Green Bay Packers.

Oh, and prior to the game, Andy said, while under the influence of three overpriced beers at the Pen in Safeco Field, that he was going to marry Karen one day.”

  • Seahawks No Super Bowl, Because Darren Bevell Sucks, But Andy Won Karen’s Heart
  • Puyallup’s Most Eligible Bachelor Knows Nothing About Love and Marriage
  • Brotherly Advice on A Long Lasting Marriage, From Andy’s Heroes: Rocky Balboa
  • Six Rocky Movies – Something You Can Learn About Love From Each

 

  • Rocky I – Apollo 1 – Look For Her First
  • Rocky II – Apollo 2 – Believe in Each Other, Have Faith & Do Something For Her
  • Rocky III – Clubber Lang – Eye of the Tiger – Fight For Each Other, Communicate, Be Each Other’s Biggest Fan
  • Rocky IV – Ivan Drago – Soundtrack Tyler listens to when he works out – Do The Work
  • Rocky V – Awful movie, it SUCKED – Nothing Is Perfect.
  • Rocky Balboa – Hollywood is Hollywood – “You know, I couldn’t have done nothing without you. Yo Adrian, we did it. We did it.”
  • Creed – Discuss later when I’m the greatest uncle the world has ever known.

  • Thank You To Mom & Dad
  • Thank You To Karen’s Family: Susan & Larry, Haley, Tracy
  • Thank You To Groomsmen
  • Thank You To The Bridesmaids
  • Welcome Karen – “You Look Like A Movie”
  • Andy – “Proud to be your brother, proud to stand by your side today”

 

  • CLOSE: From today on, you are Kandy, and may you enjoy nothing less than the sweetest life together. Cheers!

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Want to print a copy of this guide? Download the PDF version.

Dealing With Nerves

Dealing With Nerves

Over the years, I’ve performed as the Master of Ceremonies at hundreds of wedding receptions. And to this day, there are times when I STILL get nervous about the prospect of public speaking – typically, it’s right before the Grand Entrance and my Opening Remarks. However, I’ve learned a few tricks and techniques on how to deal with public speaking nervousness over the years, and I am sharing them with you below. I hope they help you as much as they’ve helped me.

 

Do Your Homework & Don’t Procrastinate
Very few of us can speak brilliantly right off the cuff. Nearly all professional speakers need to spend some time thinking about what they want to say, and more importantly, how they want to say it. Start developing your toast at least a month early and practice, practice, practice! The more you prepare, the more confidence you will build in the days leading up to the wedding.

 

Know Your Audience
Remember this: you are about to speak in front of the easiest and most supportive audience possible: family and friends. Ask yourself: “What is the worst thing that could go wrong with my toast?” Every toaster I’ve proposed this question to answers the same: “I forget my speech, break down in tears, and totally embarrass myself in front of everybody.”

Well, let me tell you something, as someone who has seen this exact scenario happen countless times before – the audience will be pulling for you. Again, you have the MOST SUPPORTIVE audience one can speak in front of! Even if you fail, life will go on and everyone will still love you. Always keep the job in perspective.

 

Utilize Your Nervous Energy
If you are well-prepared and have the right attitude toward your duty as a toaster, it is natural to feel at least some nerves. Even professional speakers – actors, comedians, politicians, and talk show hosts – feel nervous before they “go on”. Take a note from them: use your nervous energy to help focus your concentration on the moment before you. Just like the Eminem song: lose yourself in the moment, own it, reclaim your calm, and you’ll perform stunningly.

 

Visualize Your Success
Once you have written, revised, and rehearsed your toast a few times, try this popular visualization exercise technique used by professional speakers. Sit in a quiet, darkened room, close your eyes, and then run through your entire speech in your mind’s eye and visualize the success you are experiencing. See the smiling faces. Hear their laughter. Experience the burst of “Cheers!” and the clinking of glasses. Feel the hug you receive from your best friend. Feel the pride – and the sense of relief – as you smile and walk to your seat, knowing you just crushed it.

Repeat this technique each night of the week leading up to the wedding, and I guarantee you’ll be ready.

 

Rehearse In Front Of Two People
I recommend rehearsing your toast in front of a loved one, such as a spouse or parent, and in front of a friend who won’t be attending the wedding. Have both keep track of your speech’s duration and ask each to offer any constructive feedback they may have. In addition to fine-tuning your delivery and content, you’ll build even more confidence as you’ve now performed this speech “live” twice before.

 

Do Some Physical Exercise The Morning Of The Wedding
Burn off some of your nervous energy with a walk, a run, pushups, or clang and bang some iron, etc. This workout will help you feel more relaxed, healthy, and clear, as you are fueling your body with oxygen and your brain with endorphins.

 

Limit Your Alcohol Intake Until After Your Toast
I understand a drink or two can help one loosen up, but I never have a drink until after my final wedding performance of the weekend. This includes the night before. However, I’m a paid professional, so I have to curfew my drinking completely. So, I’m not saying you CAN’T drink alcohol until after your toast. I’m just saying to be mindful of your alcohol intake leading up to your toast. If you want a drink to calm some nerves before you “go on”, fair enough.

As mentioned before, most toasters are nervous because they don’t want to embarrass themselves. Avoid any potential embarrassment of being that inebriated toaster with the slurred, rambling speech and limit your drinking until after your toast. Trust me, there will be plenty of time to catch up.

 

Take A Deep Breath & Find Kind Eyeballs
Here’s a great exercise to do right before you begin your toast. As you approach the microphone, take a couple of deep breaths. Take a few more deep breaths as you lay down your notes. Then look up and quickly find a kind pair of eyeballs. Speak to them as much as you can. If you have a significant other, ask them to sit in the audience and not by your side. Remember, you already rehearsed in front of them, right? 🙂

 

Don’t Be Afraid To Laugh At Yourself
Look, you might make a mistake during your toast. Freudian slips happen all the time – I’ve seen many toasters fall victim to them, and over the years, I’ve done a few myself. The trick is to realize that if you do, have a laugh at yourself and your supportive audience will laugh right along with you. Plus, it will help relieve some anxiety in the process.

 

Remember, The Bride & Groom Chose You
Obviously, the Bride and Groom have confidence in your ability to speak at their wedding. They’ve watched you chop it up with your friends and family in the past, and they know you’ll do great in front of everyone. Remember this as you prepare and go forward.

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Want to print a copy of this guide? Download the PDF version.

A Collection of Toasts
A Collection of Toasts

The following is a personally curated list of twenty-five of my favorite wedding toasts. Some are romantic. Others are philosophical. And a few are light-hearted and satirical. My goal is to offer a balance of sugar, spice, and everything nice – what I believe every good wedding toast should be. If you would like to view more, please visit my blog, where I post a new collection of wedding toasts every so often.

Important Note: Feel free to personalize these toasts by inserting the bride and groom’s names in place of “the bride” and “the groom”. First names are much more personal and sincere than using generic titles.

MY ALL-TIME FAVORITE WEDDING TOAST: “May today be the day you love each other the least.”

 

“May your marriage endure in both sunshine and shade.”

 

“Here’s to the new husband and here’s to the new wife. May they remain lovers for all of life.”

 

“May the two of you be poor in misfortune and rich in blessings. Here is to a wonderful wedding day and an even more marvelous marriage.”

 

“Here’s to the past, for all that you’ve learned. Here’s to the present, for all that you share. Here’s to the future, for all that you’ve got to look forward to.”

 

“To the two secrets to a long-lasting happy marriage: here’s to a good sense of humor – and a short memory!”

 

“May you live as long as you like, and have all you like for as long as you live.”

 

“May your love always be added. May it never be subtracted. May your household multiply and may your hearts never be divided!”

 

“To the lovely bride and groom, here are my wishes for you. May you always have a place to call home and may you always be surrounded by those you love.”

 

“May you have love, health, and wealth, but most importantly, may you have the time to enjoy them all.”

 

“To be able to find your soul mate is a true blessing. Let us raise a glass to the bride and groom. Thank you for sharing your blessing of happiness with all of us.”

 

“Here’s to health and prosperity, to you and all your posterity. And them that doesn’t drink with sincerity, that they may be damned for all eternity!”

 

“May there always be work for your hands to do. May your purse always hold a coin or two. May the sun always shine warm on your windowpane. May a rainbow be certain to follow each rain. May the hand of a friend always be near you. And may God fill your heart with gladness to cheer you.”

 

“May your glasses be ever full. May the roof over your heads be always strong. And may you be in heaven half an hour before the devil knows you’re dead.”

 

“To you both, it’s worth bearing in mind that neither of you will ever be perfect, but you can be perfect together.”

 

“May you be friends to each other as only lovers can, and may you love each other as only best friends can.”

 

“May the future hold your happiness. May the future hold your health. May your heart hold your love, and may your arms hold your babies, yet to come. Here’s to your future happiness together!”

 

“May your refrigerator always be filled with Budweiser, and may all of your ups and downs be under the covers.”

 

“Marriage is an interesting arrangement that allows you to annoy that one special person for the rest of your life. But it is so worth it when you really love each other. Congratulations to the bride and the groom – may they continue to annoy each other for many more years to come.”

 

“May your joys be as deep as the ocean and your troubles as light as its foam.”

 

“Let us raise our glasses to the happy couple. May you grow old on one pillow.”

 

“May your love be modern enough to survive the times and old-fashioned enough to last forever.”

 

“To the bride and the groom, may you always find comforting strength and endless happiness in one another. Please join me as I raise a glass to these two newlyweds.”

 

“To love, laughter, and a happily ever after. To the bride and the groom, your fairy tale is only beginning.”

 

“May you never lie, cheat, or drink. But if you must lie, lie with each other. And if you must cheat, cheat death. And if you must drink, drink with us for we all love you and wish you both the love and happiness of which you deserve.”

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Want to print a copy of this guide? Download the PDF version.

For Grooms Only: The Groom's Speech
The Groom's Speech

I strongly encourage each of the grooms I work with to do a Groom’s Speech. Why? Because it is classy, it shows a tremendous amount of respect and gratitude towards your guests, and perhaps most importantly of all: it exemplifies why you are THE MAN on your wedding day.

Even if public speaking isn’t your forte, the Groom’s Speech shouldn’t be something you fear at all; in fact, you should look forward to it. Not only is it a fantastic way to thank those that helped make the wedding day possible, but it also allows you to reflect on an event that brought two families together as one. And there are two simple elements to an effective Groom’s Speech: heart and light, playful humor.

In other words… be James Bond.

Now, I can’t write your speech for you. But I can help you out with a basic outline, which with some clever segues and transitions, will flow naturally between points. Let’s examine a basic template for a Groom’s Speech, along with some advice for each point:

  1. Opening Remarks (~15-30 seconds)

Depending on where in the order of formalities you are delivering your Groom’s Speech will be of importance here. If you are speaking after the Grand Entrance, you could begin along the lines of:

“WOW! There are A LOT of people here. On behalf of my wife – how cool is it that I get to say that now! – thank you all for coming.”

If you are speaking after the formal toasts, it is as simple as thanking whoever toasted before you. For example:

Thank you, Greg, for your kind words, and thank you to Sally, Michael, and Anne for your toasts this evening as well. They were all fantastic – my wife and I are honored and humbled by your words. Now… it’s my turn.”

Use your opening remarks as a segue from what just happened to the objective of your speech: expressing a ton of gratitude. Ideally, 15-30 seconds for the Opening Remarks is sufficient, however, if you think you have something more captivating to say, feel free to go for it.

  1. Thank Your Parents (~30-60 seconds)

Naturally, start by thanking your parents, as appropriate to your family situation. Thank your parents for your upbringing – don’t be afraid to express some humility! – and feel free to share an anecdote or two from your childhood years: memorable, humorous, and/or amusing.

If you desire so, you may also thank your grandparents and siblings, as well. Again, it is completely up to you and your family tree.

  1. Thank Your Bride’s Parents (~30-60 seconds)

After thanking your parents, it is time to turn to your new in-laws and thank them for welcoming you into their family as their new son. Find a couple of positives to say about each family member – maybe even share a quick anecdote that is playful and amusing – and then thank them for raising a beautiful daughter, who had you never met before, you would be worse off.

The trick here is to play this one completely safe. If you have a sarcastic sense of humor, avoid using it unless it has gone over extremely well at past family events. Even then, I advise you to tread lightly: keep in mind that your new parents-in-law often invite some of their closest friends and work colleagues to the reception, many of whom you have never met before. When in doubt, stay classy and be charming.

  1. Your Bride (~2-3 minutes)

After thanking her parents, it is easy to segue to your bride. I recommend two to three minutes, which shouldn’t be difficult at all. Here, you will speak openly and honestly about how much you love her, and don’t forget to tell her how beautiful she looks. I advise my grooms that this section needs to accomplish three things:

  • Make Her Smile & Laugh
    Fairly easy to do as you are using light, playful humor.
  • Make Her Shed A Tear
    Also easy to do if you are speaking from the heart. Just avoid sounding like a cheesy Valentine’s Day card.
  • Share The Moment You Knew She Was The One
    Everyone loves a good love story and I’ve found this to be the most powerful part of the Groom’s Speech. You win over EVERYONE here, even the catering staff.

If you do these three things right – which means you need to put some serious thought and planning into this – you will have the whole room in the palm of your hand, and perhaps shedding a tear. You’ve just created a powerful emotional attachment to your celebration. Everyone feels a part of something special.

But you aren’t done just yet, Mr. Bond.

  1. Thank The Wedding Party (As Necessary)

The next set of “thank you’s” are directed to the ones that stood by you and your wife’s side at the ceremony. First address the bridesmaids – praise them for looking simply stunning this evening – and then thank them for all their time and efforts in making this day possible and helping your wife throughout the entire planning process.

Of course, you should also thank your groomsmen for their efforts and for always having your back. You may refer to your Bachelor Party as a great time of bonding you’ll always treasure and remember, but it is best to leave 99.9% of the stories from that experience out of your speech. Remember heart and light, playful humor that even your elder guests will love.

  1. Thank Key People That Went Above & Beyond (As Necessary)

If there are individuals outside of your wedding party and family that went above and beyond at any point during the wedding planning, make sure you acknowledge them. Perhaps you had friends who sacrificed a couple of evenings to assist with the RSVPs, addressing them, stamping them, and dropping them in the mail. Or maybe one of your guests baked all the cupcakes and pies for the dessert bar.

Whoever they are, whatever they did, honor them with a public shout-out and make them feel special.

  1. Thank Guests Again & Flip (~15 seconds)

Before you conclude, you have one last expression of gratitude to offer: thank your guests for coming and let them know this party is for them.

The following paragraph has been perfected over my career, and if you say it with genuine authenticity and conviction, it will get a huge cheer. I give you full license to use it as you wish (keeping in mind slight alterations are needed depending on when you deliver your Groom’s Speech):

“As much as this is our wedding day, we have designed this party for you – our closest family and friends. So please, enjoy the food, drink a little too much – we do have transportation options for you! – get down on the dance floor, make new friends, reacquaint with old ones, and have a fantastic time this evening. On behalf of my wife – how cool is it to finally say that! – thank you so much for celebrating with us tonight! We love you!”

Congratulations, Mr. Bond, you just CRUSHED your Groom’s Speech!

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Final Thoughts

Final Thoughts

Relax and have fun! You have been granted the honor to not only wish the newlyweds well on behalf of the entire room, but you also have the opportunity to create some fun and unique memories for all.

I will provide you with ample time to prepare before we begin the evening’s toasts – take the time to step outside, gather your thoughts, psyche yourself up, etc. I strongly recommend you do not just sit there and stress out – please, do something to relax. If you are leaving the reception room, please let me know so I can quickly find you when we are a few short minutes away.

You have done your part: you have prepared your toast, rehearsed more than once, and you understand how to use the microphone.

Take a deep breath.

Relax.

Be in the moment.

And… CRUSH IT!